


I Can’t Compete

by unsaved_joj



Category: Singer/Songwriter - Fandom
Genre: Comfort/Angst, Crying, Drabble, Multi, loosely based off of slow dancing in the dark, there is a lack of Brian and Joji fics wtf
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-05
Updated: 2018-11-05
Packaged: 2019-08-19 12:07:10
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 691
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16534256
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/unsaved_joj/pseuds/unsaved_joj
Summary: “She doesn’t want me.” Joji croaked out, slipping a cigarette between his teeth.





	I Can’t Compete

**Author's Note:**

> hey guys! i hope u enjoy this :’)

“She doesn’t want me.” Joji croaked out, slipping a cigarette between his teeth. Brian tilted his head slightly, face unreadable yet shocked. He was honestly surprised that the girl gave up on Joji. They seemed to be really hitting it off, especially after the double date they’d recently gone on. Of course, Brian got a girl he’d never speak to again to go with him, but that didn’t matter. Joji talked about her all the time, someone he was passionate about, his dark eyes lighting up. But that had all changed within a week or so. Joji held the lighter close to him, illuminating his pale and tired face in the darkness of the living room.

Brian shook his head slightly.  
“Shit, Joji. How’d you find out?” He asked, genuinely curious. Joji took a brief drag, letting the smoke collect and float to the ceiling fan.   
“Told me. Straight out. I thought I could trust her.” He spat at the end, anger clear in his tone. Brian didn’t know how someone could just do that. Throw a person away that cared deeply about them.   
“That’s terrible.” Brian commented weakly, fearing he wasn’t enough comfort. Joji snorted.  
“Really?” He asked sarcastically. Almost a millisecond later, he said, “sorry,” in an apologetic tone and took another drag. “I’m just hurting, Brian. Really bad.”

Brian nodded, an arm slung around Joji’s shoulder. Joji shivered at the touch, a chill going through his spine. He craved affection like a drug but was always too scared to ask for it. In times of comfort, he was always terrified that gestures would turn into more than what they were. Like the night when Brian woke up screaming from a nightmare and Joji got too close too fast. He felt as if he’d invaded Brian’s space, despite Brian’s words, like he’d touched a button he shouldn’t have pressed. Joji swallowed hard, setting his cigarette down in the ash tray. Smoking was feeling suffocating right now.

“I’m gonna get a drink.” Brian said, standing up, the warmth of his arm leaving Joji. Joji just nodded, looking away to his phone and changing the current song that was playing. Brian walked into the kitchen, bare feet chilled against the cold floor, pulling a glass from one of the upper cabinets. His throat was dry, maybe nervousness? Brian never understood why he got so anxious around Joji. He felt lighter, his face hotter, his palms sweatier than usual. Brian stuck the glass under the faucet and turned on the water, listening to the smooth jazz playlist going on softly in the living room.

He could hear the floorboards creaking, assuming Joji was getting up to use the restroom. Brian shut off the faucet, sipping the not-so-great tap water, thankful that his throat wasn’t dying anymore. The music playing was nice, despite how cheesy it was. Brian always liked jazz or blues, especially since it helped him focus. He totally would make a jazz record if he had the courage. As he was listening, he couldn’t help but notice a small background noise, softer than the music. 

Brian set down his glass, ears perked. The sound seemed to be an awful lot like crying. Shit. He shouldn’t have left Joji alone. He turned, entering the living room, and found Joji standing alone in the center of the room. He was looking down, letting out small sobs, his shoulders shaking in the dark. Joji didn’t take breakups too well.  
“Hey...” Brian mumbled, moving forward and wrapping his arms around Joji’s neck. “It’s okay, Joji.”

“N-No.” He muttered, trying to pull away, but Brian wouldn’t let go.   
“You’re okay.” Brian whispered, a hand going to the back of Joji’s neck. He was still surprised he didn’t feel any hair, Joji’s buzzcut a new and different feeling.   
“I d-don’t want to take ad-advantage of you.” Joji sobbed into Brian’s shoulder, the shaking feeling making Brian want to cry himself.  
“You never will, Joji.” Brian soothed him. Joji choked, hot tears spilling onto Brian’s t-shirt. 

“D-Don’t leave, then.” He barely croaked out the words, practically going limp into Brian’s arms. Brian nodded.  
“I won’t. I won’t.”

**Author's Note:**

> give me some feedback y’all  
> i might post more, who knows


End file.
